I have really been struggling with a few spiritual issues lately, and yesterday’s sermon was just what I needed to put things in perspective. To make a long story short, our wonderful pastor sat among us as one of us and poured his heart out to his congregation about how moved he was by a recent camp meeting at which a video was played. Then he played the video for us, and gave us all a chance to respond. I’m sharing the video at the end of this post.
I have to confess that I’m sure I have many types of tangible idols in my life like food, weight loss, media, volunteering, my home. There are times when it seems I allow these things to take priority over my time with God. I have known this for a while and I’ve been striving to keep God first in these areas.
However, the Lord showed me something yesterday that I hadn’t thought of before. I have been praying for a very long time about various loved ones. I know they are not walking with the Lord. I’m not condemning them or standing in judgment, but either the fruit they bear has revealed their hearts or they have as much as told me that they aren’t where they should be, some are stubborn and don’t believe they need to change or that they don’t need to grow closer to God, and some have gone so far to say they don’t want a relationship with the Lord.
I am closer to some of these loved ones than others, but that doesn’t really matter. My love for their souls outweighs any closeness we have on this earth. Anyway, I don’t see most of them on a regular basis, but some I see often, and it breaks my heart when I see the steps they are taking in the wrong direction and the example they are setting for the younger ones who are watching.
I am in regular, fervent prayer for these individuals. Now, don’t get me wrong, I am not standing in judgment of them thinking I’m better or closer to God than they are. When I pray for them, I also pray for myself and my walk as well. However, I have probably spent more time praying for them than myself lately. That isn’t necessarily a bad thing because we want our prayers to be unselfish, but I’ve allowed it to become a burden. I have allowed my burden for my loved ones to cast a shadow on my joy and my relationship with God. I’ve allowed a constant heartache to remain instead of praying, giving it over to God, and letting Him take care of it.
This is so difficult for me because it’s constantly on my heart. Sometimes, it affects other members of my family and I feel I should step in handle it. It is difficult to know when it is in God’s plan for me to step in or when if it’s part of God’s plan. However, I have to give it to God and follow His direction.
I don’t think that praying to God is an idol because when you pray you are communicating with God, but I think sometimes I allow the weight of the burdens and answers to the prayers to become an idol. I’ve worried more about them than I have working on my relationship with God. I’m going to continue to pray for these burdens and await God’s perfect timing for the answer. In the meantime, I’m going to work towards clearing this and the other idols from my stage. I am going to let God and my relationship with Him take center.